What Do You Do When Your Friend Tries to Kill His Wife?
Well, it’s been an emotional couple of days.
We’d been busy working on preparing a Christmas party for our Monday night Gypsy meeting. We spent a few days cooking 10 liters of soup and making up gift bags for all the kids. We bought bread, snacks, drinks, fruit, disposable plates and silverware. We prepared some Christmas songs and a short Christmas message. Then we got everything loaded up in bags, bundled up the kids, and walked / slid through slippery, slushy, cold, potholed sidewalks to get to Lalli and Mandra’s house to hand out gifts, share the love of Jesus, eat some food, and spend Christmas together.
A couple blocks from the house, we met up with Jason, who informed us, “Hey, guys, I’ve got some bad news. I don’t know exactly what’s going on, but it looks like Matei’s in prison and Geta’s in the hospital. They said he got drunk and pulled a knife on her. They’re saying he cut her up so bad they’re not sure she’ll live.”
“What?” we all kind of gasped. Of all the people we’ve met in Romania, Matei was one of the smartest, nicest, and calmest. He prayed to turn from sin and trust Jesus a couple months ago, and he was reading his Bible, praying, and growing every day. When we met Monday nights, he’d come with questions and always ask us to pray for him. He was always smiling and cheerful. When we taught him something from the Bible, he just did it. He didn’t do drugs, never yelled at his wife or kids around us, and was one of the last people I’d expect to be in prison for cutting his wife with a knife.
We had been teaching on baptism the past few weeks, and Matei was one of the most excited about it. We learned later that he had even gone out and bought a new suit specifically to put on for his baptism.
None of this about him attacking his wife made any sense.
So we went to the meeting with mournful, confused hearts, hoping there was a communication problem, hoping it was a different Matei, hoping to find everyone gathered and ready for Christmas celebrations as planned.
When we got there, we were greeted by a mournful sight. Women were in tears, wailing in Țiganeasca, the Romii language. Men walked around looking sullen and dejected. Teresa, the spiritual “mother” of the group, explained what happened. No one could tell us why, which was the question on all of our hearts, but at least we learned some of the details.
Matei, our Matei, Matei who was growing in Jesus and excited to be baptized, who had purchased a new suit to be baptized in, had gotten drunk Sunday and at about 6:30 pm, he and his wife Geta got into a fight outside the Mega Image grocery store near their house. Matei, who apparently has made it a habit to walk around carrying a 6-inch knife, pulled the knife out and violently slashed at his wife. Like a madman, he cut her arm, her back, her shoulder, and then slashed deep into her stomach and chest.
Teresa explained that Matei was quickly arrested and Geta brought to the hospital. By Monday night, news of Geta was bad. She had lost half her blood, her liver and internal organs were severely damaged, she was in serious pain, and she was completely unresponsive and unable to eat. She was in intensive care and doctors were keeping a close watch on her.
Teresa and Rita, who were filling in all the details for us, were pretty sure she wasn’t going to make it.
We all sat there, crammed into the kitchen, covered in sweat, mud, and snow from the walk, in complete shock. No one felt like eating the food we’d prepared. We didn’t even want to hand out the gift bags to the kids. We just sat there dumbfounded and confused, wondering how something so terrible could happen. And how could Matei be the one who did it? None of it made any sense.
All the kids were gathered, so we handed out gifts to them, and though they were really excited about the gift bags, it seemed so fake in the face of what had happened between Matei and Geta.
The rest of the night, we talked about what happened, we encouraged everyone with the Word of God as best we could, we prayed for Matei and Geta and their kids, and we prayed for each other, trusting that God would bring comfort and turn this dark situation into something light.
Things like this can drive you to question how God could possibly be alive and real, or they can bring you to the reality that, in this dark, dark world where people do stupid stuff that doesn’t make any sense, God Himself came to bring a light that would one day extinguish that darkness forever.
Isaiah 9:2 – “The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness, on them has light shone.”
If bad things like this happen while a good, loving God watches over us, can you imagine how evil our world would be without Him?
Pray for Geta – her situation has improved by now (Tuesday night), but she is still in serious trouble physically and emotionally. Pray for Matei – we don’t know why he did what he did, but we want to see him repent and we want to see Jesus glorified in his life all the same. He’s looking at at least a few years in prison for what he did. Pray God protects him from hardening his heart and instead uses the time in prison to give him a soft heart toward Jesus. Pray for their kids, Matei, Maca, and Ștefan, caught in the middle of everything, facing an uncertain future. And pray for the families of Gypsies at Mihai Bravu, that God would use this to draw them closer to Jesus and soften their hearts to His love.